Bringing Honesty to Our School Subjects: Honest Slogans for Each

In the educational journey, each subject has its own noble purpose. However, these slogans reveal some of the not-so-honest realities behind them. Let's take a humorous, yet enlightening look at what these subjects might say if they could shout their truths.

Math

Math is known for its precision and logical structure, but there’s a downside to this clarity. If Math had an honest slogan, it might be:

"Teaching you about unimportant things at the expense of practical things because we need to justify our master degrees."

Adding to the confusion, there's a specific strain of Math known as Common Core Math, which could boast:

"How to do unimportant things in the most illogical and inefficient manner because a small minority of you couldn’t figure out the method that worked for thousands of years across multiple nations, countries, age, and gender groups and languages. Oh, and because I have a piece of paper with someone’s signature on it and political people who told me that I am smart so clearly that makes my way right. Did I mention that political people tell me I am smart, I might get laid now since I changed how math is taught. At least that is what my mom told me."

English

While English is supposed to teach us the wonders of language and literature, sometimes it feels more like a mystery. Here’s what English might say if it could:

"12 years of knowing where or where not to put the ‘e’ because it was important to somebody we forgot and is long dead."

Social Studies

Social Studies is meant to teach us about the past, present, and future. Yet, it often feels like a reminder of our failures. Here’s what Social Studies might honestly say:

"Re-gurgitating long forgotten biases so that you can feel bad about yourself."

Psychology

Psychology is supposed to help us understand ourselves, but sometimes it feels more like a distraction. If Psychology could speak honestly, its slogan might be:

"Feeding you crap because its more important for us to be right than for us to find out the truth. Oh, and Freud. Just because."

History

History is meant to teach us about the lessons of the past. However, it often feels like an excuse for forgetting the past. Here’s the honest version:

"Lying to you so that you can forget the lies other people taught you."

Computer Science

Computer Science is supposed to prepare us for the tech world, but the real truth might be:

"How to learn Microsoft Word and Excel but you won’t."

Home Economics

Home Economics is supposed to teach us practical skills, but sometimes it feels more like an obligation. Here’s what it might honestly say:

"How to cook and sew instead of how to work, budget, and understand contract terms."

Shop

Shop, which is supposed to teach us about working with materials, often feels like a distant dream. Here’s what Shop might boldly admit:

"How to work with wood even though you will never afford these tools, a shop, or a home for that matter."

As you can see, these brutally honest slogans for each college subject might crack you up, but let’s not take them too seriously. They’re meant to provide a dose of reality while highlighting the sometimes hidden facets of our educational journey.