How Children Learn in School: The Power of Role Models and Self-Value

Children learn best by observing and emulating the people around them, often referred to as role models. This learning process is not limited to the school environment but extends to homes, communities, and even fictional characters. Understanding and valuing oneself is equally important, as it helps build the foundation for making informed and responsible choices.

The Importance of Role Models

Many of us can recall the cliché statement by Aristotle, who famously said, 'Give me a child until he is 7 and I will show you the man.' This highlights the significant impact role models have on a child's development. Children learn by example, and if fortunate, parents, relatives, or teachers can serve as positive role models. However, the guidance of a role model can extend beyond conventional figures, including teachers, neighbors, store employees, or even fictional characters like MacGyver or Robin Williams, and even cartoon characters like Bugs Bunny or Road Runner. A child's early experiences, such as imprinting on a duckling, mirror the process of identifying and adopting the behaviors and attitudes of a chosen role model.

The Balance of Self-Value

Just as important as learning from examples, children must also learn to value themselves. This concept is poignantly captured in the quote by n-Ivy Compton-Burnett, 'Parents have too little respect for their children just as the children have too much for the parents.' Essentially, this imbalance can hinder mutual respect and healthy parent-child relationships. Reflecting on oneself, just like the blades of a pair of scissors, is crucial. If one blade is much shorter than the other, the scissors struggle to function efficiently. Similarly, a lopsided sense of respect or value can impair both parent and child's growth, making it essential for both sides to find balance.

Setting a Positive Example at Home

My personal experience teaches that children learn best when they see consistent examples being set and heard. We engaged in regular discussions and conversations, ensuring that both the parents and children actively listened to each other. We also established age-appropriate rules and expectations, using explanations and, when necessary, fair consequences. This approach, which proved effective, laid the groundwork for responsible decision-making.

I often shared my thoughts on the importance of making choices and learning from life's lessons. I began these discussions early on, explaining the rules and expectations:

Distinct Phases of Learning:

Early Childhood: Choices are about being good and obeying parents or being naughty and facing consequences. Adolescence: Choices become more complex and carry greater implications. The rules and expectations are firmly established. Adulthood: Choices become fully independent, with parents still available for guidance and support.

While this approach generally worked, we encountered challenges when away from home, where different rules applied. One memorable instance involved a toy store visit with my daughters, aged 2, 4, and 6. Before entering, I warned them about the importance of not requesting toys for ourselves. Throughout the store, I heard them whispering about wanting certain toys, which led to a smile from me, albeit brief, during the shopping experience.

Conclusion

The key to effective learning in children lies in providing them with positive role models and fostering self-value. By observing and emulating these models and understanding their own worth, children can make informed and responsible choices, shaping their future into the individuals they are meant to be. The examples set at home can significantly impact their development, laying a strong foundation for their personal and academic growth.