What Should You Never Ask an Indian Person?
India is a diverse and richly textured country with its own set of traditions, values, and challenges. However, innocent questions or comments can often lead to misunderstandings or hurt feelings. Here are some questions or statements to avoid when conversing with an Indian person to ensure mutual respect and understanding.
1. Arranged Marriage
Many in the West assume that all Indian marriages are arranged, while others believe that love marriages are the norm. In reality, the choice varies widely among individuals and families. Arranged marriages are still common, but love marriages are growing in popularity.
Incorrect Assumption: Are you going to have an arranged marriage?
Correct Response: Though many Indians are subject to arranged marriages, many couples are also married based on love and personal preferences. Both are legal in India and valid forms of marriage.
2. Exoticism and Racism
.PERCEIVED RACISM AND EXOTICISM
Describing an Indian person as 'exotic' can be a sensitive issue. In many cultures and around the world, there is a lingering stereotype of exotic people as mysterious, foreign, and intriguing. This can be burdensome and even offensive to Indian individuals.
Incorrect Statement: You are so exotic.
Correct Response: This statement should be avoided. While it might be well-intended, it can be perceived as patronizing or offensive. Instead, it's best to treat everyone as individuals rather than making generalizations based on their ethnicity.
3. Food Preferences and Criticism
Indian cuisine is incredibly diverse and vast, with thousands of unique dishes. For many Indians, their food is a source of pride and cultural identity. Denigrating Indian food, especially by using the term curry, can come across as insincere or narrow-minded.
Incorrect Criticism: I like Indian food but hate curries.
Correct Response: It's important to understand that 'curry' isn't a universally understood term, as it can vary widely in meaning across different regions of India. Indian food is more than just curries and encompasses a diverse array of dishes. Criticizing all of Indian cuisine just because you dislike a particular dish is disrespectful and can make Indians feel judged.
4. Accents and Stereotypes
The idea of a uniform Indian accent is a misconception. India has over 18 official languages and hundreds of dialects, making the landscape of accents incredibly diverse. Imitating a stereotypical Indian accent can be disrespectful and can offend many Indians.
Incorrect Imitation: I can imitate the Indian accent.
Correct Response: Acknowledge the diversity of accent while emphasizing that it’s not representative of all Indians. India is a linguistically and culturally rich nation with a wide variety of accents and dialects. Such imitation can perpetuate stereotypes and makeup a micro-aggression.
5. Professional Aspirations and Stereotypes
It's a common stereotype to assume that all Indians are destined to become doctors, scientists, or IT professionals. While these professions are indeed very popular, the reality is that Indians are excelling in a myriad of fields. Other career paths and professions are equally prosperous for Indians.
Incorrect Stereotype: Are you going to become a doctor, scientist, or IT engineer?
Correct Response: Indians are excelling in various fields, including entertainment, arts, sports, and more. It’s essential to recognize and respect the diversity of career paths and success stories among Indians. Just a few examples include Priyanka Chopra (entertainment), A. R. Rahman (music), and Srinivasa Ramanujan (mathematics).
6. Religious Beliefs and Misperceptions
The worship of cows is a significant aspect of Hindu culture, but it often gets exaggerated when perceived by outsiders. While cows are revered, they are not considered deities but rather respected and cherished symbols within the religious context of Hinduism.
Incorrect Stereotype: Do you worship cows?
Correct Response: Cows are respected in Hinduism, but they are not worshipped as gods. In Hinduism, cows are considered sacred, but the significance is more akin to reverence than worship. This is primarily a belief within the Hindu community, and it's best to show respect by acknowledging these cultural practices rather than questioning them.
Conclusion
India, like any other country, is a conglomeration of rich traditions, diverse values, and modern aspirations. Engaging with an Indian person requires an open mind, respect for their beliefs, and an understanding of their cultural context. By avoiding these common pitfalls, you can foster better communication and mutual respect.
Thank you for your understanding and sensitivity towards these cultural nuances.