Why Does Happiness Seem Fleeting While Suffering Lasts Longer?
There is a common misconception that happiness is a constant state, while suffering is a fleeting one. In reality, both happiness and sadness are temporary and volatile emotions. Understanding this fact can help you find greater contentment in your life.
Training Your Mind to Experience Emotions
The way you experience happiness and sadness is often a result of how you have trained yourself to perceive these emotions. Many people mistakenly believe that happiness is solely an external condition. They think that if their life is going well, that should equate to happiness. However, happiness is a subjective feeling, not an absolute condition of life.
Individuals often look at others' lives and see a beautiful home, an ideal life partner, a lot of friends, a well-paying, and enjoyable job and interpret this as happiness. While these external factors may contribute to a sense of well-being, they are not the true definition of happiness. Happiness is an internal state, a feeling that is fleeting, just like all other emotions.
Focus and Perspective Matter
Happiness is a result of your focus, perspective, and thoughts. The way you choose to focus your attention can either create a feeling of happiness or sadness. If you consistently generate feelings of sadness, it indicates that you are using your focus to consistently generate those emotions. You notice the conditions that cause feelings of sadness and believe that these perceived conditions are your reality. This is a reality that you reinforce without effort because it is what you are used to.
Actions and Reactions: Maintaining Happiness
True happiness is not just a result of external conditions; it is created through actions that benefit all parties involved. Happiness requires maintenance and sustainability through continuous actions and reactions. Simply put, you must take positive actions that contribute to your and others' well-being to experience true happiness.
The Role of Attention and Curiosity
Our natural tendency to focus more on negative events and memories can make sadness seem more enduring than happiness. We often fail to appreciate the good news or good happenings in our lives. The positive moments are fleeting, and we do not value them as much as we should. On the other hand, negative events tend to capture our attention more, and their effects linger longer in our minds. This human trait of curiosity explains why negative news often sells well and is more impactful.
Entitlement and Life's Challenges
Sometimes, we feel entitled to happiness, assuming that our current state of happiness is the baseline of life. When times are easy, and happiness seems effortless, we may not realize how transient this feeling is. Conversely, when challenges arise, we often find them more difficult and longer-lasting because we have become accustomed to the ease of our previous life. In this sense, suffering feels longer because it is a contrast to a period of relative ease.
The Scientific Perspective
From a scientific standpoint, there is a connection between our brain chemistry and the perception of time. When we are happy, our brain releases certain chemicals, such as dopamine, which can affect how our brain perceives time. This can make happy moments feel like they are passing more quickly than they really are.
Why Does Time Fly When You're Having Fun?
Certain chemicals released in the brain during positive experiences can alter our perception of time. For example, when we are deeply engaged in a fun activity, our brain is busy processing various stimuli and signals, which can make us feel like time is passing quickly. In contrast, when we are not engaged in enjoyable activities, our brain's activity might be more passive, leading to a slower perception of time.
Understanding these concepts can help you embrace the fleeting nature of happiness and the enduring nature of suffering. Recognize that both states are natural and temporary. By focusing on positive actions and maintaining a positive mindset, you can experience more contentment in your life. Remember, true happiness is not a constant state, but rather a result of continuous effort and perspective.